For people who are unafraid to ask, the world is filled with possibilities. For one such person, an adventurous spirit and a series of asks fast-tracked her from her home in the Midwest to the television studios of Los Angeles.

In her 30s, Margaret Moira “Peg” O’Brien was a businesswoman living in Chicago and creatively involved in acting, writing, and painting while studying directing. She had heard that directors of sitcoms sometimes let fledgling directors “shadow” (follow) them on the set where they could closely observe the director in action. She felt this was her next step, provided she could get a director’s permission.

And that was a big “if.”

When I interviewed Peg, in 2014, she was 65. We met in her apartment on Chicago’s lakeshore. Here’s the story she relayed to me in her own words:

“It was in the little kitchen of a cottage I’d rented in New Buffalo, Michigan that I said to God, ‘I know my next thing is to shadow directors but don’t have any idea how to do it. So, that’s your job.’ I don’t often give directions to God but that day I did.

A few days later I was back in my apartment in Chicago when a friend called me by mistake—she’d intended to call another friend also named O’Brien. I told her, ‘As long as I’ve got you on the phone … you’re in California and I want to shadow sitcom directors. You’re closer to that than I am in Illinois. Do you know anybody that knows anything about that?’

She said, ‘Oh, sure, my sister—she’s in the Directors Guild of America.’ So, she talked to her sister, whom I also know.

One month later, I was in Los Angeles shadowing directors on the sets of three different sitcoms in a two-week period. If that wasn’t miraculous enough, I’d been given an assigned parking space right near the studio door!

Watching three different directors in their element, I sat in these studios stunned that I’d gotten there that fast. I didn’t expect God to come through that clearly or that quickly.

On the set of Murphy Brown, then one of TV’s hottest shows, I got a chance to ask Lily Tomlin for advice on how to pursue a career in the business. I also got a tip from the assistant director, who said if I really want to watch a master director at work I should come back when [now-retired] Peter Bonerz returned, and shadow him.  So, when I got back to Chicago I wrote to Mr. Bonerz.

Normally I’m an extraverted person. I’ve always had moxie. But something about asking Peter Bonerz had me shaking in my boots. I thought, Where do I get off saying, ‘Hello pal, invite me to watch you!’ But I wrote the request anyway and put it in the mail.

A short while later I received a very gracious letter from him inviting me to the set. Naturally, I went!

And when I was back in the Murphy Brown studio, I made a point to talk to the actors and camera operators, asking them what I could do to further explore the director’s craft. A cameraman named Kieran bubbled over with all kinds of helpful information. He was truly happy to be asked. When you ask anybody for help, more often than not they want to help you. They like sharing what they know and are honored that you want to know about their knowledge and experience. Here was this wonderful cascade of support, simply because I had asked questions and said I wanted to learn.

Although directing ultimately took a backseat to other opportunities and obligations in my life, those few weeks in L.A. gave me confidence. I had gone from being alone in my New Buffalo kitchen to immersed in a constellation of supportive people on the soundstages of L.A. It was a nice payoff from the Old Irish tradition of asking, ‘Who do we know who might know somebody?’ It doesn’t hurt to ask. And in my case, it worked.”

“Let your dreams outgrow the shoes of your expectations.”

– Ryunosuke Satoro

Note: I interviewed Peg O’Brien a few months before she passed away, in 2014. She was one of the first people I interviewed back when my book was just an idea. Thanks, Peg, for your positive and lasting example.

Hollywood sign photo by De’Andre Bush on Unsplash

Paul Quinn is author of a book-in-progress about the power of asking, from which this story is excerpted.